The 35 Most Ridiculous Things People Have Put On Their Resumes

Robert Half, the late founder of staffing firm Robert Half International,began publishing the most ridiculous things he'd seen on resumes, job applications, and cover letters in the company's newsletter in 1966.

He called these errors made by jobseekers "Resumania" and encouraged hiring managers to submit bloopers that they came across. The firm has continued to collect them ever since.

Below are some of the most ridiculous things they've seen in almost 50 years, published here as they appeared on the resumes:

OBJECTIVE:

"To secure a job or a career."

"To become a billionier."

"I aim to work with your organization. You will provide me with challenging tasks to perform in an efficient way and then reach the top and achieve the maximum out of the given opportunities enriching my strengths and beating all my weaknesses."

"I am seeking a permanent position to get out of debt."

"To find a challenging and rewarding job in a _______."

"I am looking for a challenging career where there is scope for ample demonstration because I am always on the lookout for a positive and bigger outlook, currency and ideas which thrive on imagination, passion and boundless curiosity and rigorous thinking."

"To be able to wear feathers to work. Appropriately, of course."

QUALIFICATIONS:

"I have some experience in the technology industry, but that was 20 years ago."

"I have incredibly entertaining hair."

EXPERIENCE:

"As an administrative professional, I coordinate meetings, make travel arrangements and assist security staff with badgering."

"Marketing assistant: When writing and editing actor bios for theater playbills, I had to explain to small-town actors that no one really cared that they had the starring role in things like Mrs. Smith's third-grade class rendition of Peter and the Pumpkin Patch."

"Answer phones, file papers, respond to customer e-mails, take odors."

"Plenty."

"Restaurant manager. Cleaned and supervised employees."

"More than seven (8) years of general experience, of which more than four (5) years is in analyzing, designing and testing client/server applications."

"I work in the store's men's department, stalking shirts and pants."

"Small family business that holds no potential. Owner and managers, my father and his brothers, have no business sense."

EDUCATION:

"Minor public relations."

"Attended collage courses."

"Trained in CPR and harassment."

"Took a specialty course titled How to Be Patient With an Impatient Boss."

ACCOMPLISHMENTS/AWARDS:

"Can run circles around my peers because I am not tethered to my phone, email, Facebook or any electronic device."

"My last client called me a god, so that was award enough."

"Dean's list in college; honor roll in high school, middle school and elementary school."

"Attained the rank of Eagle Scot."

"Achieved so many awards. I have brought home many first-, second- and third-place trophies."

"Numerous hardware and software certifications. I could wallpaper my entire bathroom with them, but my wife would kick me out if I did."

SKILLS:

"A lifetime of experience keeping track of time."

"Goog at computer work."

"The ability to use short bursts of muscle force to propel myself - as in jumping or sprinting or throwing an object."

"Excellent memory; strong math aptitude; excellent memory."

INTERESTS/HOBBIES:

"Chess, soccer, cricket bowling."

"Michael Bolton."

"Gossiping."

"Married, eight children. Prefer frequent travel."

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5 Tough Interview Questions And How To Answer Them

 
       
  1. What are you proud to have did you accomplish at your last job?

                 This question gives the interviewer the opportunity to learn your strengths. Simply saying “I increased social media engagement” isn’t going to give your interviewer a sense of what you accomplished. Instead, tell them how you increased social media engagement for the company and why your help was valuable.

It’s important to master the art of the humble brag to make a good impression. Feeling proud of your accomplishments is fine. Endlessly discussing your value to the last company you worked for gives the impression you are arrogant.

2. Tell me about a time when you messed up at work. How did you fix your mistake?

Everyone makes mistakes, but not everyone has the ability to quickly solve them on their own.

This question is not a trap. It’s the employer’s way of learning if you are able to fix your mistakes. Honestly talk about a mistake you made, but focus mainly on how you solved the problem.

Begin by saying, “A time I messed up at work was when I gave a customer a quote that was considerably lower than it should have been. I realized my mistake and immediately told my boss about the situation. I knew the business was going to take a hit financially, so I offered to work longer hours until I had worked off the debt from my mistake.”

This answers the interviewer’s question but focuses more on the positive parts of the mistake.

3. What is your five-year plan?

When interviewers ask this question, they want to know if you will last at the company.

Picture where your career is going. Maybe the job you’re applying for is only a stepping stone to a bigger and better career. Letting your potential employer know their business is nothing more than a pit stop on your career road trip could cost you the job.

Instead of letting an employer know you don’t plan to stay with the company long-term, think about what you hope to get out of the position. Talk generally about how you hope the position will prepare you for your next career move. Mention your desire for career growth within the company.

Only apply for jobs if you honestly see yourself working there for the foreseeable future. Otherwise, it’s not fair to you, the company, or the person who would actually be the best fit for the position.

4. Describe how an apple tastes to someone who can’t taste.

There isn’t a right or wrong answer to this question. This question reveals your ability to think critically. Take a moment to think about how you will respond.

One way to answer the question is, “I would describe the taste of an apple as refreshing because of how juicy they are. While a person may not be able to taste, they can probably feel the juice as they bite into the apple. When I think about apples, I imagine the fresh, juicy sensation that comes with taking my first bite.”

Even if your answer isn’t the same as the rest of candidates interviewing, it shows your ability to think on your toes. Your interviewer will appreciate whatever answer you give as long as you provide a reason for why you chose the description you used.

5. What religious holidays do you practice?

It is illegal for an interviewer to ask you about your religion, age, marital status, if you’re a parent, or your sexual orientation. Employers use these questions to discriminate against applicants in the hiring process.

Don’t assume your interviewer is intentionally asking illegal questions. One in five interviewers unknowingly asks an illegal interview question based on CareerBuilder’s April survey.

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